Inflation’s Impact on Retirement and the Cost of Confusion

Darryl:
You know how at the beginning of summer you kind of don't know what to wear? Because in the morning there's that little chill in the air and the afternoons are like scorching hot.

René:
What do you mean at the beginning of the summer? If you live in Kirkland Lake, that's every day in the summer.

Darryl:
This is true. This is true.. Well, today, down south from you, it's fun to call Toronto down south. I had one of those days and I discovered that my thighs have absolutely no respect for personal space.

René:
There you go.

Darryl:
I wore a nice light pair of pants, a light long sleeve shirt, thinking, hey, this is a nice summer, professional look. I walked one block, one block in the city today, and the temperature was rising fast and I knew it. But by the time I got to my meeting, it felt like two balloon animals were fighting in my pants. There was sweat, there was friction. I'm pretty sure sparks were fucking flying. My inner thighs probably could have powered a small village at that point. And the worst part was, is you can't fix that gracefully. There is no sexy way to waddle into a meeting and try to act normal while silently calculating how can I discreetly pull off.

Darryl:
You know that lunge you do to try to unstick everything?

René:
Yeah, yeah.

Darryl:
You know the one I'm talking about? Women deny that they do this. But they do. They do the little lunge just because they don't have the. They don't have the testes hanging down. They still do the lunge to unstick everything.

René:
Oh, my God. You have to unstick the underwear. That's the worst feeling ever.

Darryl:
But then I think the worst was, is that I sat down in this meeting and it was a bit of a boring meeting, I won't lie. And all I could think about is the old SNL sketch Schweddy Balls.

René:
Yeah, schweddy balls. Such a classic.

Darryl:
Except mine weren't a holiday treat. They were more like, you know, like sizzle and sack of summer.

Darryl:
This is Taming the Hustle...

René:
... or Something of the Sorts

Darryl:
You know what's worse than having schweddy balls?

René:
Is you talking about your schweddy balls.

Darryl:
Exactly. All right, what's on the agenda today?

René:
Oh, man. I want to talk about something that's super impactful. It's inflation and the impacts of inflation on your retirement. Because we put a lot of emphasis on inflation when we're designing a plan, and we're trying to execute a proper plan to make sure that it's a successful one.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
People do not realize the impact of inflation over the long run.

Darryl:
Yeah, no kidding.

René:
So let's say you have a client that's like 67 male and expected to live till age 82. Okay. You've got 15 years and by 82 he's probably not doing a ton, right. My father's almost 82, very active, still got a brand new four wheeler, use it at camp all the time, you know. But he's a bit of an anomaly.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
But at the same time, he has no real needs and wants. He doesn't buy new clothes, he doesn't buy jewelry, doesn't travel. So he spends very little on, you know, maintenance of his vehicles and stuff. So your cash flow requirements are less. Even though inflation is still impactful. But we have a lot of clients that have built a lot of wealth and have the ability to retire, say at, at 50 even.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
Or 55.

Darryl:
I'd like those friends. I want to be that guy.

René:
Yeah. I don't know, man. Honestly, I could retire today. Like I have a financial plan set up that says if I call her quits today, I'm going to be okay.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
But I have way too much to accomplish still. I feel I have way too much to give. I need purpose. I like for me to wake up on a Saturday morning, I fuck all to do. I just can't, I can't fathom that idea.

Darryl:
I just want to not go to a meeting with, you know, sweat in my pants and.

René:
Yeah, yeah, I guess, I guess you can pick and choose what you do and. That's a good point. It's a life without sweaty balls.

Darryl:
That's right.

René:
Mint. So anyway, let's, let's say you do retire at 50 or even 55 and you're a young, healthy, active individual and 20 years down the road you're 75. I have a lot of clients that still winter in Florida or Mexico or wherever who are super young and healthy 75 year olds who do as much or more than they did when they retired at 55. Okay, so imagine retiring at 55 with a certain income, with no inflation, and at 75, 20 years later trying to live the same lifestyle on the same income when cost of living has increased substantially. So let's put a few things into perspective. I'm not much of a stats guy, but I used AI to get a bunch of data for us to be able to have this very interesting conversation about how much shit costs 20 years later.

Darryl:
Gotcha.

René:
So the 100 year average in Canada was 2% in, and that is the inflationary rate that we would use for planning. Since I started in 1999 till the pandemic. In recent years, the hundred year average because of the pandemic, the war in Ukraine, you know, all of the shortage issues that we've seen come from China and everywhere else. We've got a hundred year average of 3%. Bank of Canada swears they're going to get us back to two. We are skeptical. So all of our plans that we're designing now, we're meeting halfway at two and a half. And even that might be too low.

René:
Who knows? Because I don't have a crystal ball. I wish I did.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
Let's rewind, dude to 2005.

Darryl:
That was a good year.

René:
There you go. Okay. I wanted you to physically put yourself. Not physically.

Darryl:
Yeah, put me physically back there. Right back there.

René:
I wanted you to have the 2005 mindset. Okay, so. So a point in time. You and Erin are dating.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
I've got two kids and my sixth year in business and I'm on my second house. Okay. So the average home price in Canada, so all provinces, the average was $250,000 in 2005. In 2025, the average is 720,000. So almost three times. Luckily, the average income has almost doubled. So we're close to keeping up, but not quite. But if we design a plan with no inflation, we're doing you a huge disservice.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
And you're setting yourself up. Or we're setting for a disastrous retirement. So if you're working with a financial planner that ignores this factor, or if you're a do it yourselfer, that's not considering inflation for your retirement plan, you are in trouble. I can promise you.

Darryl:
Yeah, that's scary.

René:
The average cup of coffee or the medium Tim Hortons cup of coffee. So you just order like a medium double double in 2005 was $1.29.

Darryl:
Okay.

René:
$2.69 today. A Ford 150.

Darryl:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

René:
I asked AI to give me the average price of a mid range F150. So they came up with the XLT Super Cab 4x4. Kirkland Laker, Pinewood Park, Motors. Half a KL is driving this truck. Yeah, it was $32,000 in 2005.

Darryl:
Pocket change.

René:
It's over $70,000 today.

Darryl:
Wow. Crazy.

René:
More than twice. Beer drinkers. I love my wine, but as you know, there's wine across the world. That goes from what, five bucks? Four bucks maybe. But let's say in Canada, eight to eight hundred dollars.

Darryl:
Exactly.

René:
So it's a pretty wide range to compare. But let's say a case of Bud Light. So you got a 24 pack of Bud Lights in 2005. You're buying this for camp. You're going camping with your buddies. Because that was the age we were at then. I had a crew cab Tacoma with the cab on it and I kept my canoe on the top and I was always ready to go fishing. I either hooked up my boat or I went fishing in my canoe.

René:
You grabbed the case of Bud Light. 24 bucks in 2005.

Darryl:
Oh my goodness.

René:
$44 today.

Darryl:
Yeah. Whoa.

René:
Okay. So I went around the office today and rounded up my team for some brainstorming and I said, guys, if we're talking about inflation on our podcast today, what are some of the relevant things that you think would be more impactful in your personal life so that it reaches home to our listeners? We want to talk about the average Joe that is going to be concerned about certain costs.

Darryl:
Yeah, yeah.

René:
Okay. Here was one of them. The average home insurance cost 2005 was 6 to $700 Canadian per household in 2005. Today the average is $1176.

Darryl:
Well, that's crazy.

René:
Double. Next you do a renovation because home maintenance is another worry for people. A two by four. So an eight foot two by four, I'm going to put you on the spot because you do that to me sometimes. So a construction grade 2 by 4, 8 footer in 2005. I already knew the answer because of life experience of what I was doing at that era. How much was the 2 by 4 and 8 foot 2 by 4 in 2005?

Darryl:
Somewhere probably between a buck or two.

René:
Close 99 cents. You could buy a fucking 99 cent 2 by 4, 8 footer construction grade in 2005.

Darryl:
And they didn't even sell them at Dollarama. That boggles my mind.

René:
Buck or two, you kill me. Today, Home Depot, most competitive wholesaler in Canada. $3.50 for construction grade. Three and a half times in two decades. You can't afford the beer, can't afford the two by fours, can't afford insurance, and I had to sell my house because it's three times the price. Just can't afford it.

Darryl:
I bet you the rope has not inflated as much.

René:
The rope is because it's conducive to putting yourself out of any misery.

Darryl:
Exactly.

René:
Oh my God. You know what? I often laugh at our lifestyle topic. It's rare that I bust out in laughter in our financial planning, but this is so relevant because the age old story of my grandpa bought a Cadillac for 3,500 bucks. Like, you can't buy a Caddy for under 80 or 100,000, depending on what you're buying now. Like, it's crazy.

Darryl:
But even something like that. My grandfather bought a Cadillac when he was in his 40s. He still was not buying a new car. When he was in his 80s, he was still driving that same Cadillac because it lasted.

René:
No kidding.

Darryl:
Now you do have to buy a new car.

René:
Yeah. My mom and dad bought their first house for less than $20,000, Darryl. It's insane. And they paid cash because they wanted to make sure they can afford it. So they saved up first. We live in a really different world.

Darryl:
No kidding.

René:
Okay. Relevant to you and me. All inclusive vacation. Here's a fun one. Mid range resort in Cancun. I'm there in 2005, taxes included. You can get a really nice resort for 1900 bucks. Average today in Canadian currency is $4100.

Darryl:
I think my luggage is 1900 dollars. Just to get it on the plane.

René:
Okay. Service calls. We talk about the retiring of the baby boomer generation and how it's affecting blue collar service trades. Right. Plumbers, electricians, and all of that stuff.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
If you had to bring a plumber into your house in 2005 and were billed by the company, it was an average of $35 an hour in Canada. Put this into perspective. The average salary of a plumber today is still $35 an hour. So what you were being billed in 2005 is what the plumber is now earning. They've gained the profit margin, which means they were making significantly less.

Darryl:
I see. I see. Okay.

René:
But now the average is 100 to $120 an hour.

Darryl:
Gotcha.

René:
So now you have to understand the snowball effect of that.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
Why is plumbing so expensive? Well, they're paying the plumber more.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
But it's all the other stuff that people don't see. They're like, oh, the plumbing company's making a pile more money and they're taking advantage of inflation. But we just talked about all the other stuff. It's the overhead. Licensing is more expensive. Insurance is more expensive. Travel cost is more expensive because fuel costs are three times more in the last two decades. So the operating cost of that company is significantly higher and they have to pay their employees more.

René:
So that's why it's substantially higher. Minimum wage in 2005 was $7.45. It's $16.55 now.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
So even if you're paying minimum wage.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
You know, people Say, oh, Tim Hortons coffee. So expensive. Or Starbucks or wherever. It's not because Starbucks is trying to make. Well, I mean, of course they're all trying to be profitable. That's, you know, that's why we work, to try to earn money, to make more money the same time. You have to realize that they're trying to offer the best bang for their buck. But they also have more insurance costs, they have more utilities costs, the food costs.

René:
More food cost is insane. The guy plowing your driveway, you know, Liz mentioned, she says the guy playing my driveway goes up every year. Like, I can't believe how much. It's way more than two and a half percent, right? So it's funny, when you start talking to people about what matters is, like, everything seems to go up. So. So let's circle back to the start of our conversation, is you're 50 or 55 years old now. We're fast forwarding. So if you were 50 in 2005, you would need to have two to three times the cash flow to just maintain the same lifestyle that you enjoyed the day you retired.

René:
So if you ignore that, you're living off of, like, fucking crackers and you're not using your air conditioning, and you don't have two vehicles anymore, you're down to one. And you probably don't travel a bunch. And you're not booking those all inclusives because they're twice the price. It's crazy. And you can't afford to call the plumber to fix the problem.

Darryl:
Fuck. At that point, I'd just be putting on lingerie or something. Forget about the sexy housewife. It's sexy. Darryl, fix my toilet. Here's a little leg for you.

René:
We haven't even touched on the stuff that just blows inflation out of the water. Like education is another one you and I talked about in prior episodes. It's like the average inflation rate is like 6.7%, I believe, since 1990. Like, that's fucking insane.

Darryl:
My son was looking at universities like he's going in September.

René:
You should deny being his father so you don't have to help him because it's too expensive.

Darryl:
I did ask. I tried to sucker the mailman into believing he was the father, but no but it's funny how things slip away and you don't realize it.

René:
Darryl. I remember being in high school nearly 30 years ago.

Darryl:
I'm surprised you remember. Yeah, it's been a long time.

René:
They call it old timers instead of Alzheimer's, and it was less than $10,000 a year. Like you can get a university degree for under 40 grand.

Darryl:
Yeah. Crazy.

René:
My youngest is in third year of university at Brock right now, and it's a solid $28,000 per year.

Darryl:
Yeah, that's crazy.

René:
That shit ain't slowing down either. No, if you're a do it yourselfer and you're just saying, okay, I've got a million bucks, I'm going to divide that over the next 22 years to my expected age of death, and I'm going to factor in the taxes I'm going to have to pay on that rsp, and this is what I'm left with, and I'm going to live off of that. And you ignore inflation. I'm not going to call you an idiot, but I'm like, you need to find some help because you are going to be faced with a very rude awakening at some point in your retirement. Find somebody. Doesn't have to be me, doesn't have to be Ryan, doesn't have to be our team at all. But find someone who's competent, who knows their shit, who is going to take good care of you because inflation is a very, very important factor in your retirement plan.

Darryl:
No kidding.

René:
I had a lot of fun gathering data for this.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
The team and I just reminiscing 20 years back, what things cost. It was mind blowing. I didn't keep the data because, oh, man, I went through so many stats today preparing for this podcast. I was like, I got to shave some of this shit off because I could be talking for an hour. But anyway, one of them was a restaurant experience. That's one of the ones my team brought up.

Darryl:
Probably something like $30 for two people.

René:
So the average in 2005 for like the average mid quality, like not fine dining. But you're not going to Arby's.

Darryl:
Yeah. You're going to like Kelsey's.

René:
Or a mom and pop shop that's delivering a decent meal for you. It was 25 to $30, and now it's 50 to 65. So you're twice the amount there.

Darryl:
Well, and back then, wowing Erin into thinking I am super sexy was very easy. So the 20 to $30 was the right cost.

René:
You didn't have to spend anything. You just had to shake your sweaty balls.

Darryl:
That's the thing. But now I know you say, would you say 60 to $70?

René:
50 to $65.

Darryl:
$65. You got. I'm even going like in the 90 range because I got to buy a couple more glasses of wine to start looking a little thinner.

René:
Well, that doesn't include the wine. No, no. So you've got a nice meal at a mid range restaurant. So if you're spending 65 each. So for the two of you, that's a buck 30. And that's another thing with the wine. So now you're buying a bottle of wine. They have considerably increased the markup.

René:
Another one of our team members in the city this weekend, they were drinking like a $14 bottle of Chianti at this Italian restaurant. They're like, let's have the Chianti. It goes well with the meal and it was nearly 60 bucks, but it's like 14 bucks at the friggin LCBO.

Darryl:
It's crazy.

René:
And the other thing, okay, I might be sidetracking a little bit because this isn't inflation, but we have to call out the elephant in the room with the whole tip percentage. Like back in the day it was like you would go 10, 12 or 15 on the machine. You don't see 10, 12 and 15. Now it's like 18, 20 or 25.

Darryl:
Exactly.

René:
You drop 200 bucks.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
You're giving a fifty dollar tip. Holy.

Darryl:
It's insane.

René:
Like I'm all for good service and I pay for service. I'm a tipper. I'm a strong, strong tipper. But I'd love to get a 25% tip for doing what do.

Darryl:
See, I was a server, I was a bartender. I tip really, really well because I know how shitty that job can be. So if I have good service, even average service, I over tip. Even bad service sometimes I give a tip that's probably better than what they're getting just because I know they got to tip out to the kitchen and to the, you know, to the bar, whatever. But when I go somewhere and I order something or I buy something and it comes up.

René:
You ordered online and you picked up.

Darryl:
Yeah. And they're like tip. And I'm like, tip? I did most of the work. I'm all for tipping, but you have to do something to get the tip.

René:
Just the tip?

Darryl:
Yes. Make me feel special and I give you the tip. Just the tip. We'll be right back.

Darryl:
All right, so I want to talk about the tip for a second.

René:
I'm just kidding me, man. Your sweaty balls. The tip. This is not the kind of relationship I have with you.

Darryl:
All right, fine. I won't talk about that. Let's talk about something that's killing your business slowly. And it's confusion.

René:
I'm confused.

Darryl:
It's that thing where your potential customer lands on your website or your social media, or here's a radio ad, sees your TV commercial, looks around for three seconds and then goes, wait, what do these people do?

René:
Yeah.

Darryl:
And when that happens, it's like instantly a switch goes off and they're gone. They vanished. They're ghosting you like a bad Tinder date.

René:
That is the craziest thing that you bring this up, Darryl, because I didn't know what your topic was until just before the episode.

Darryl:
So you were a little confused.

René:
I was very confused. I was on Instagram today at lunchtime.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
And I. I'm a Capri guy. Like three quarter length shorts just below the knees. But there's not a ton of capris for men.

Darryl:
And there shouldn't be.

René:
I find it's. No, but I find it's preppy with a nice dress shirt for work and stuff. So I can casual it down a little bit, but not be too casual.

Darryl:
Yeah, yeah.

René:
They were fucking awesome. It was like a sports brand of some sort. It wasn't Lululemon, but something similar.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
I click on it and it automatically took me to, oh, sign up for this, sign up for that register. Here's a 40% discount as a first time user, the little X icon I had to press so many times on their fucking site that I left. I didn't buy anything. I said, this noise. I can't do this. All I wanted was a pair of capris, but they tried to sell me on discounts and on registrations and memberships so bad. They're trying so hard to captivate their audience that they blew me off.

René:
Like, it was a total turn off. I'll never go back on that site if I see it again.

Darryl:
They blew you off and it was a total turn off. They're not doing it right.

René:
Yeah, no kidding. This is a messed up episode with just the tip and sweaty balls.

Darryl:
Well, listen, I get it. We all want to sound smart with our business. We want to be witty, we want to be clever. But not everyone can write like the crew in Mad Men. Sometimes in trying to sound cool, you forget to sound clear.

René:
Sometimes too much is too much.

Darryl:
Exactly. When people are confused, they do nothing. Or like you, they click, they close it. That's it. Crickets. That's kind of why I want to talk about is the cost of confusion. Because I promise you, if people don't get what you do, what you sell, or why they should care, you've already lost money out of your pocket.

René:
I agree with you, man. You're the master. Because you're on to something.

Darryl:
Let's start with the classic mistake, and I said it a minute ago. Clever, over clear. And here's a sentence I saw in a local cafe's Instagram bio last week, and I wish I was making this up. It said, where caffeinated dreams meet artisanal moments in the urban brewscape. What the fuck does that mean? Are you a coffee shop or are you a spoken word poetry club? I don't know. I'm not kidding. I scrolled through their feed. I could not tell if they sell lattes or life coaching.

René:
I don't think anyone should use artisanal in their marketing.

Darryl:
It was all vibe and no clarity.

René:
It was a latte.

Darryl:
It was a lot eh. Which brings me to this. If you are trying so hard to be on brand, and people love that fucking term on brand, it's like the new hot words in 2025. But if you're trying so hard to be on brand that no one knows what you offer, you're not branding. You're a fucking word souffle. Be clear first, you can be clever after. If they don't get it, they won't buy it.

René:
As an entrepreneur and as a consumer, I 100% agree with you, sir.

Darryl:
Because confused minds don't convert. That's simple math your accountant will tell you.

René:
Love your topic, by the way Darryl. Honestly, because so many companies mess this up.

Darryl:
Oh, 100. This is a basic sales truth. Confused minds don't buy.

René:
My mind's a bit blown, honestly, because I've never heard anyone like vocalize or verbalize this.

Darryl:
Really.

René:
It's verbal diarrhea when it comes to marketing. It's a total turn off.

Darryl:
Yeah. Think of your audience like they're shopping in a store that they didn't plan to walk into. You've got five seconds before they leave. And if you're wasting all five seconds of it telling them you're solution oriented innovator in the personal digital ecosystem. No, you build fucking websites. Say that. Because when you're clear, people get excited, they feel smart, they feel confident, and confident people buy. Confident buyers convert.

René:
No one cares about a scent scientist. Just tell us you make candles.

Darryl:
Exactly. Now, the cost of confusion is real. And here's what unclear messaging actually costs you. First, obviously, the loss of sales. Next is the wasted Ad dollars. Because your call to action might sound hot and sexy, but if no one knows why they should click, you wasted those ad dollars. And the next you're going to love this one... is poor word of mouth. Because if your customers can't understand what you are.

Darryl:
Sorry, not even your customers. If your potential customers can't understand what you do, then they won't be able to explain what you do to their friend. So they won't. They'll never talk about you. And the last thing it's costing you is you. Because you end up re-explaining the same damn thing 200 times and hating your own brand. You take up an insane amount of your time daily to make people understand what you do.

Darryl:
And at the end of the day, you're like, it's so simple. I don't get why they don't understand what I'm saying. And it's exhausting. What I like to say is, it's like running a business inside a fog machine. You can't see what you're doing. No one gets it. They can't see you.

René:
I didn't realize the importance of your message tonight, dude. This is really, really impactful. I really, really hope that business owners are listening. If you've messed this up, how do you fix this? How do you get back on track?

Darryl:
Here's what I want you to do. STEP 1. Pull up your website, your Instagram bio, your email header, whatever. Now pretend you're someone who's never heard of you before and give yourself 10 seconds. Can you tell what you do, who it's for, and why it matters? If not, rewrite it. The next step, STEP 2: Ask a friend who doesn't work in your industry to explain your business back to you. If they say anything like, you do stuff with, like, marketing vibes, you've already got a problem.

Darryl:
If they can't explain what you do in a few words, and they are your friends, you've done a poor job of explaining what you do do. Which takes us to STEP 3. Cut the fluff. You don't need to say passionately disrupting the artisanal wellness space. You sell soap. It's great soap. Just say that.

René:
Man, this is so impactful because I've seen so many people that had good intentions that just couldn't make a go of it because it just. They're so lost in the fluff. The fluff doesn't make you money.

Darryl:
No, not at all.

René:
We walk into a crowd, and somebody will introduce me and be like, oh, I already know René. He's my money guy. It's like we're known as financial planners. It's very clear. Our message is very, very clear. There's people that are so lost in the fluff, sometimes I'm leaving conversation. Like, what are they? What. What do they do?

Darryl:
Exactly.

René:
That is a marketing flop, in my opinion.

Darryl:
100%. Your job isn't to sound impressive. Your job is to sound understood as a business owner. Because once they understand you, then you get to impress them. So take a red pen to your messaging. Kill the clever lead with clear. Then and only then, you can be clever. Only be clever after the people care.

Darryl:
Simple. All right, that's it for me. Because unlike the cafe on Instagram, I don't need a full paragraph and a thesaurus to tell you I'm done. We'll be right back.

Darryl:
All right, let's get into this now, because I want to talk about something that might just flip your mindset in the best way possible. We spend so much time thinking about what we haven't done in life. Like the trips we haven't taken, the businesses we haven't launched, the novel we haven't written, the abs that I don't have yet. And don't get me wrong, goals are great.

René:
You may never have them.

Darryl:
I'm starting to think I'll never have abs. Just ab. Don't get me wrong, goals are great. And you know I love a good list, but sometimes, instead of a bucket list, what we really need is a reverse bucket list.

René:
What the fuck? Okay, I was impressed with your whole marketing thing, but now you've gone, like, total right field.

Darryl:
Okay, hear me out. It's a list of all the amazing, terrifying, bold, meaningful, hilarious, beautiful, completely ridiculous things that you've already done. Not the someday stuff, the already live stuff. And what I'm talking about is-

René:
The ridiculous things... One of the most ridiculous things I've ever done is become really good friends with Darryl Boulley.

Darryl:
Put it on your reverse bucket list.

René:
It's on my top of my list.

Darryl:
Well, here's the thing. The reverse bucket list flips that that because it's a mindset shift from I'm behind to I've already done amazing things. And this can help with anxiety burnout, imposter syndrome, which we've talked about before, and that I'm not doing enough feeling that we all get sometimes. These reverse bucket lists can be nostalgic, emotional, often funny, and super relatable.

René:
Yeah. I don't know if we've talked about this before, but I remember Meg, like, when, I don't know, probably the first five or six years of our relationship, she kept saying, I'll be happy when. Yeah, I'll be happy when. So I'll be happy when my truck's paid. I'll be happy when we go on that trip. I'll be happy when I have that new sofa. I was like, yeah, why do you have to wait for your truck to be paid to be happy? Sometimes have to celebrate and be really excited about the stuff you've already done.

Darryl:
Exactly.

René:
And forget about the shit you haven't done yet. That's. That's yet to come.

Darryl:
Yeah. Because most of us walk around feeling like we're falling short all the time. Right. Like we should accomplish more by now. But if you actually wrote out all the things you've already done, the growth you've experienced, the people you love, the hard crap that you push through, you'd realize you're kind of a badass.

René:
And it helps shape who you are, too.

Darryl:
No kidding. So I did one of these reverse bucket lists recently, and I wrote out a lot of the hard things that I went through. And it was crazy to look back and say, because, yes, there are still things in my life I want to accomplish. I have that bucket list. It's a pretty big bucket list, but I think it's attainable. But when I wrote out that reverse bucket list, and I look back at this long list of things that I accomplished, hard things I overcame, I said to Erin, I'm like, I'm an absolute badass. If someone looked at this list, they're like, you got to write a book.

René:
It'd be a children's book with a lot of photos.

Darryl:
Well, it's more of a Where's Waldo? It's like a Where's Darryl Book.

René:
Yeah.

Darryl:
Here's the thing. You've done the hard things. You've had the moments that someone else would call their dreams. You've probably made someone's life better, even if you didn't notice at the time.

René:
That's very true, Darryl Boulley.

Darryl:
I see this a lot where people are trying to chase a dream, trying to chase a bucket list. You're not lost. This list, this bucket list, it's not unattainable. You just kind of forgot about your greatest hits. So here's your challenge, and I know you knew this was coming. This week make your reverse bucket list. Not your vision board, not the post on Instagram just for you. Write down 10 things you've already done that you're super proud of, big or small, serious or stupid. The solo trip you were scared to take, but you did anyways.

Darryl:
Write that down. The moment you stood up for yourself, write that down. The moment you showed up for somebody else when you had nothing left in the tank. Write that down. The time you danced in the kitchen with your kid and thought, damn, this is a core memory. Write that down, read it out loud, and remind yourself you've already done epic shit.

René:
If I were to choose one moment, if I knew I was gonna die in the next minute, it was like, epic was right after my divorce. So when my. No, seriously.

Darryl:
Okay, I'm with you.

René:
So we have a Mexico trip planned as a family, and my wife announces to me she's had an affair, and two weeks later, we're supposed to be going to Mexico. So I said, fuck it. So the girls and I go, just the three of us, and we had one of the most amazing vacations ever. And it allowed us to leave the town where we were the buzz. But I remember being like, the girls had had their hair braided by the local Mexican girls, and we were just kind of dancing into the abyss with the ocean waves crashing into the beach with the smell of the salt water, and there was just, like, a little giggle and laughter in the air between the two of them. Anna had my cell phone, and she captured a photo of me, like, dipping Audreé into a dance move. And it was just the three of us that existed on the whole planet.

Darryl:
Amazing.

René:
It's not like that Anna had any less impact in the moment. She was the photographer.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
But she happened to capture Audreé leaning back. And at the time, Audreé had corrective surgery, so she had to have glasses on, and she was wearing her little nerdy glasses, and she was, like, 8 years old, and we had bought sundresses from the local Mexicans, like, at this little shop where they actually made them on the looms or whatever they're called. That, to me, is, like, the one of the biggest wins I've ever had in my entire existence. And I have it on photo because Anna took it, and Audreé was in it. It's such a beautiful thing. So for people that aspire to be, like, multimillionaires or grow a business to a certain market value or whatever, social status, travel, I don't know, buy a car, do something crazy. That was so simple, that little Mexico trip two weeks after my divorce.

Darryl:
Yeah.

René:
Totally blindsided from what was going on to just connecting with those two little girls that were my entire life was the most beautiful thing ever.

Darryl:
Amazing.

René:
That's. That's my bucket done list. What did you call it?

Darryl:
Reverse bucket list.

René:
Yeah, that's my reverse bucket list right there, man. That's.

Darryl:
That's amazing. I love it.

René:
If anyone requests the photo, I will be happy to share it.

Darryl:
I can't believe you shared that story, knowing how sensitive I am. And I'm gonna try to wrap up the show now without crying, because you've got me there. Thanks a lot.

René:
You're more than a little sensitive. Just the tip, Just the tip.

Darryl:
Just the tip. All right, that's it for today. Go make your list. Frame it, burn it, tattoo it as a tramp, stamp on your lower back. I don't care. Just don't forget how far you've already come. If this episode made you think, laugh, cry, question things, then hit the follow button on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you're listening. And please share us with a friend who might need to hear some of these raw truths.

René:
Amen to that, Darryl Boulley.

Darryl:
Thanks for listening, and we'll see you next time.

René:
Ciao.